Sleeping Beauty

Ever had the feeling you weren’t enough? Not quite ready. Not quite sufficient enough. Not quite strong enough. Pretty enough. Talented enough. Brave enough….just not enough.

Oh, these thoughts at one time were not only thoughts, but friends. I found comfort in them and they always reminded me to simply stick to what I know. Just get by. Never pushing. Never reaching too far. Never risking, exploring, or seeking more. They had me convinced it was for my own good because if I did venture out I would only meet failure. My life was full of failures, things I couldn’t complete. Couldn’t achieve. Couldn’t improve. Couldn’t change…I just couldn’t.

Day after day of watching so many others rise and here I was sitting in my safety net of insecurity knowing if I just stay here I can’t fail. That thought, that idea and that lethal perspective on life kept me in the backseat of my own life for many years….until.

Until I met hope. Hope saw me, the real me. And for the first time when my familiar friend said “Oh no, you can’t do that, what if you fall?” Hope said, “Oh, but darling, what if you fly?”

And that thought. That glistening spark called hope ignited courage. It ignited Papa’s love in me which in turn illuminated my soul. I began to see how much I truly possessed within myself. So much strength, beauty, compassion, courage, wisdom and love. All this time those things were hidden away and Papa was continuously cultivating them. Breathing life on them. Just as Sleeping Beauty slept once her finger pricked the spindle. The courageous spirit in me simply slept as my finger pricked the spindle of insecurity. As those things lay dormant in my soul, Papa carefully tended them and nurtured them waiting for the day when hope would come in and awaken me once again.

So many nights I would ask Papa to help me. Pull me out. Stop the thoughts, not realizing it would only take true love’s kiss to awaken the real me. So when hope came she gave me a gift…a mirror so that I could see inside myself and I realized I already possessed everything I saw in everyone else. Everything I longed for. Everything I thought I would never have.

Now hope is more than a word. Hope is the catalyst that reignited my very being. Hope awakened me like true love’s kiss awakened the sleeping princess. True love’s kiss was the realization that who I am is more than enough. I saw myself and I loved myself and that awakened me. That revived me. Love truly does cast out all fear. For when I saw what I possessed, my familiar friend couldn't dissuade me. I knew I was courageous, powerful, beautiful, competent...enough!

The day I met hope, the day I began to love myself again, life as I’d always known it completely changed. And here I am dancing with hope as I am reminded how strong and capable I am. How worthy I am to be loved and to love others. Hope has come and it is here to stay and life has never tasted sweeter.

Sleeping Beauties be awakened by the kiss of hope. I see you and who you are is enough!